Shear, ugh ...

did you ever start flipping channels then forgot what you were watching, then you remember what you were watching and you go ... really?
yeah, i was watching it, luckily a replay of Attack of the Show is on.

Kids, always keeping you on a tight leash

Ghetto young boy: I wanna go upstairs! I wanna go upstairs!
Ghetto Mom: SHUT UP! Does it look like i care where you wanna go?! I mean SHIT!

-Overheard at Short Pump Nordstrom's Shoe Sale

Why I Love it

This is quite possibly one of my favorite ads I have seen in a while. Its exactly what an ad should be, simple, entertaining, and insightful.

The Lush: First Round

Welcome to my new segment, The Lush. Named after the beloved but canceled Attack of the show segment (pre Olivia Munn), in which the hosts taught viewers different drinks and drinking games, my new segment follows in their great tradition.

Not to toot my horn, but people like my drinks. People ask for my drinks at parties, and are disappointed when i'm not bar tending. I'm not saying every drink i make is a hit (trust me some drinks an estranged friend wont even drink, you know who that is) but ive made my fair share of deelish drinks. And I'm here to just give you a little bit of my secrets. I'll be writing recipes for some of my original drinks, the ways i make classics, and sharing some new recipes that i find. One reason is to record all my knowledge, And moreover to help all of you mixology challenged people out there. Even better, all my recipes are measured in a way we all can understand, and makes it easy for parties, solo cup lines or counted pours. So lets have our first round shall we?

Here's one of my staples
The Mojito

Heres my recipe for My Mojito.

In a shaker put,
2 spoons of raw sugar
leaves from 2 sprigs of mint (i like alot of mint in my mojito)
2 lime wedges

With the mixture in the shaker, muddle it together with a muddle, spoon, fork, or whatever. Then add in a little bit of ice, just to cool down when you mix (don't want to water it down too much).

Then pour in,
3 second count of gold rum
2 second count of triple sec

Cap the Shaker and shake it up nice. I like the north south east and west method of shaking.

Strain over ice into whatever you're drinking, then top off with soda water, or sprite if you want it a little sweeter, then finish it off with a thinly sliced lime.

Enjoy!
(pics not mine, but you get the drift)

Back to the grind

Alright, its summer Vay-Cay again and you know what that means.

I'm bored.

And that means I'm probably gonna be blogging. Yeah, ive got some plans this summer, new places and such, but i shall be blogging. And in the prestigious tradition of "100 reasons i hate you", "Open letter to 'That Guy'", and "do yourself a favor" im starting a new segment. you will see, probably in the next post.

Open Letter to "That Guy": This is .. whatever

"That guy" getting booted off the server

Dear "That Guy",

Guys yelling to encourage themselves or others in movies has been around for a while now. I'm pretty sure those guys writing 300 didn't exactly shit themselves when they wrote in the script

LEONIDAS
(yelling) This is Sparta!

So please stop comparing every guy yelling something in a movie to 300, it doesn't make you clever or witty, so stop.

Living in Ikea

Mark Malkoff, writer, film maker and comedian, is getting his apartment fumigated and asked a New York Ikea if he could move in for a week. His website chronicles it all. He began monday Jan. 7th and will live there for a week.

First off, sweet. Its like having 200 different apartments in one building. Second, swedish meatballs and lingonberry jam? hello? delicious!

I know he has videos and all, but can you imagine that? I mean i know that ikea doesnt really have all the utilities you need, so you cant exactly use the sinks showers or toilets, or you know, you cant use them without repercussions. And you can totally fnord a sweet blugen on top of a Kappa coffee table.

Fun with Netfilx

Hmm, take a closer look at the "two movies i'll love" based on what i returned


No shit sherlock!

Superbad Penis Clip

From iwatchstuff.com



"You know what kind of foods are shaped like dicks? The best kind!"
"I, er, dunno ... thats really messed up."

Memories?

I started this blog a little over a year ago with the epic, “Cinco de Wasted.” I thought, “hmm, how about I treat my reader with a recollection of one of my wild nights this school year?” Then I got to thinking, and remembering, and struggling to conjure up a specific memory from the past year. Yeah, I remember certain moments, dragging BLT back from Sahara, waking up in the upstairs bathroom in the boys house, I think on new years but don't trust me, and I also remember both of the Halloween parties; vaguely. However, none of these memories seem to string together. A memory from Halloween links to a memory of forties, which leads to the pimps and ho’s party, which ends with me passing out on a couch, probably because every single occasion, it was the same people, that or you know, the brain cell killing properties of alcohol.

I try to solve this problem by taking pictures, however that doesn’t work. It usually leads to me forgetting I have a camera, or taking pictures of the wall. I mean I take pictures like these …



But what I remember is this … Yeah there was no difference in the last picture, but then again, looking at an impending hangover is a whole lot worse than looking back on a hangover.


What am I trying to say here …